Can't write today. Can't even think in a straight line. Everything's all messed up in my head. Part of it is cause I'm worried about leaving the house tomorrow. I don't really know what choices to make. I wish it was as easy as right and wrong. As easy as some people think it is.
I just don't feel loved right now. Or maybe just not as loved as I want to feel. I don't know. And I'm not sure that people can deal with who I really am. Maybe that's why they don't love me. Because I scare them secretly. Or confuse them. I'm so much work.
But am I really so much more work than everyone else. I mean, everyone has issues. Am I so much more work than the guy sitting next to me or the girl down the street? I don't think so. I would like to not think so.
I feel like drowning. My Lord, do I feel like I'm drowning. I think tonight is a "watch My So-Called Life and cry at all the good parts" sort of night.
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