I got some extremely good news yesterday which is going to help me fix A LOT of problems in the coming months. Yay me!! However, right now, my family and I are still treading water. And I have a bit on my mind.
First of all, why is it never the people with more than enough who aide you in surviving when you're not sure you can?? Why is it always the people who are in the same boat as you?? Or at least once were?? I suppose it's because they understand what it's like. But in that case, I thank God that I was not born with "enough" like some of these people because they call themselves one thing and they say they care, but they are hypocritical bastards who wouldn't know Jesus from a jeweler.
Second of all, why does everyone always tell you you're going to learn something when there's a situation presenting itself complicated?? I happen to be one of those people who believe that most things happen for some sort of reason, but yes, some shit is just random. And I am going through some random shit right now. And if you want specifics, email me, and I'll tell you all about that. But I'm not going to write about anything too openly because it doesn't just involve me. But trust me, there is no lesson learned from this. And if there is I think I've learned it before: some guys are total creepers and pervs.
Third, I am itching right now. So bad. Crawling out of my skin. Just one of the very fun Bipolar Traits. If I had any money at all, I'd take my brother to the mall and walk around for hours. I'd go to the comic book store and the regular book store and then hit up Starbucks. I'd drive around and see where the gas took us and then I'd stop there and buy a burger. But right now, I just have to sit at home and itch. Because I have no money. Not yet. I have friends that aren't really friends at all. I have people who look down on me and think I caused this all myself. And I have creepers that would only take me out somewhere to try to get into my too-goo-for-them pants. UGH!!!
Oh, and a big PS - if you happen to be one of those negative people that I just mentioned above, you can kindly remove yourself from my planet because I officially DO NOT GIVE A SHIT!! If you can't ride the bus with me for unconditional support, than you certainly don't deserve to get inside my limo that's about to pull up.
I think its progress when we recognize the ppl. that are toxic in our lives a.k.a. the so-called-friends... or the ppl. that just want to use you for their own needs... A true friend will offer you that unconditional love and support without question or hesitation. I think on a subconscious level we choose the events that occur in our life for spiritual growth, but I also believe that when we are "choosing" the good, the bad, the ugly... we are in a state of all-knowing-happy-heavenly bliss so no challenge seems too "small." But for ppl. to tell you that you consciously chose the events that occured...because nobody chooses to be violated consciously... thats a low-blow and thats another person to throw into that I-don't-want-you-in-my-life-cuz-your-negative zone.
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